Self-esteem

2 Timothy 1:7

7 for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.

We often talk about self-esteem, but what is self-esteem? According to the given meaning is the following;

“Self-esteem is the positive or negative assessment that a person makes of himself in terms of the thoughts, feelings, and experiences of self. It is a term of psychology although it is used in the daily speech to refer, in a general way, to the value that a person gives to itself. Self-esteem is related to self-image, which is the concept that one has of its own, and with acceptance, that it is the proper recognition of the qualities and the shortcomings. The way a person is valued is often influenced by external agents and can change over time. Self-esteem can be gained as losing self-esteem by loving, family, work situations; by external agents or by our own positive or negative self-criticism. “Retrieved from https://www.significados.com/autoestima/23Aug2018

Many times when we go through situations of infidelity, emotional abuse, childhood abuse, Bullying and other sad experiences that have marked us in our lives creates barriers such as a barrier of shyness, rebellion, estrangement from friends and family, silence, and we create an imaginary circle so that no person can enter and so many other things that we carry in silence.

In my family there are 6 women and 2 males, the eldest is me. I remember when I was a girl that my family always gave compliments to my sisters who were beautiful and I never received those flatteries. All they talk about was my hair that was long and I think that’s why I keep my hair long. I had a lot of acne (bad) and skinny (thin). Since childhood, my sisters had their admirers and I had none. I started to tell myself that I was the ugly duckling of the family and it was not until I was 31 years old that I married.

It was not until the adult stage that I understood that my self-esteem was low. Although for many people I was strong in character, cheerful, and other good qualities, but inside me, I had always considered myself as the ugly duckling. It wasn’t until one day, I went through the divorce process, that I started looking in the mirror and telling myself “I really am ugly” and I was crying bitterly when I looked in the mirror because I looked and felt ugly. I started getting away and creating my loneliness barrier, I think I fell into a depression. But, one day, I said to myself, you know Iris Perez, get up, that’s enough. Does not matters what others say, fight, fight for what is yours, you are intelligent, and you have health and life. The truth is that I think was God who gave me that strength because I felt dead.

Feeling dead when you’re alive is a symptom that the devil uses to manipulate us.  I said to myself, are you a daughter of God? If you are a daughter of God, you are beautiful, gorgeous, walk and go to the beauty parlor, color your hair, take makeup classes, change your old clothes guard. Yes, old clothes! It was then when I opened the drawers where I noticed that there were emptier drawers since my husband took his belongings. Suddenly, when I opened my drawers, I recognized that I gave him my life and bought more expensive gifts for him than for me. “Wake up! What happened to the professional, cheerful Iris, the “Wapa” (elegant), and that people admire for how you are?” I said to myself. Wau! I recognized at that moment that I had a low self-esteem and that I had fallen into a depression.

How to wake up? Only by myself, I can awake and take the courage to move to another level. We can have people around us telling us positive things and remember who we are, but the truth is that only the person who have experienced low self-esteem and depression seem to listen to them, but the truth we do not hear anything. I remember the story of David (Bible) that his brothers despised him and even his father when he did not remember that he had a son in the field. David, the next king? The dirty, the smelling sheep? Well, yes! The one that no one  looked, nor remembered that David was going to be the next King of Israel.

Dear reader, when no one sees you, when no one knows who you are, when everyone looks at you under their shoulder, there is someone who sees you and loves you. That person knows you and has the power, the authority to remove mountains and the devil knows that, your enemy knows. What are we going to do? Keep looking in the mirror and cry? Or say, enough! Start filling our spiritual drawers with spirit, power, bravery, love, and self-control. God have created us to be image and similar to him.  If we are similar to God, then we are beautiful and powerful, intelligent, don’t you think? Well, get up and walk there is a beautiful day awaiting  for us.

Prayer: Open Your Heart

Lord, I am naked before your presence and only you know me. Forgive my sins.  From my mother’s womb you created me and in the world in which you brought us, gives us the shape.  But, I recognize that only in you, can give us the form like mud in the hands of the potter. Change my life and do me again. Although, I recognize that by breaking the old crockery goes to pain, but give me the strength and faith to continue believing in you and be able to assimilate to you. Amen.

A friendly advice

Today, Love yourself, get up, go to the beauty parlor or salon (this is not just for women, including the man), talk to a friend, go to a good place to walk and enjoy of new opportunities that God gives us.